A Crying Tear From Huo?

KL has been drenched in rain for the past two weeks, and everything looked so down and gloomy, especially for me.

While I was hanging out in a gym in Chin Woo Athletic Association in Bukit Chin Woo, KL one day, I was told that effective on 1st of January 2008, there will no longer be a gym as it was said to have stood in the way of progress.

For about a year I have found a place in the heart of KL in which I called home. Whenever I'm free, I'll drop by Chin Woo, pump some iron before calling it off as a day,assured that I will wake up with even more vigour and energy the very next day. Located right below a stadium,the small place, about 35m X 15m was infested with mosquitoes and I couldn't even walk straight without touching the ceiling but I didn't mind. I met a bunch of funny men, all of them have great physiques and all of them enjoy talking rubbish, just like me. Charging only a mere Rm12 a month, I thought that I have found paradise.

The gym, a former bathhouse-turned-exercise-facility, owed more of its existence to its members than its administrators. During the hey days of Chin Woo, a few poor bums started a gym by welding each exercise tools, such as benches and racks into place, the steel coming from nothing more than a garbage dump site. In spite of all the deficiency and half-past-six equipments, Chin Woo Athletic Association has contributed a fair share of national representatives of weightlifters and body-builders, my coach being one of them. Hopefully, in the next article I'll show you some pictures.

Nevertheless, due to internal politics and power-mongering individuals that knows how to fight for a post in an organisation but don't know what to do with it, Chin Woo has been losing its shine. The recent act of axing gym from its continuation is the ultimatum that death is knocking on its doorstep.

As you will see, iron weights do not rust easily and the gym has been running over 10-20 years with '0 cost' maintenance. What cost Chin Woo is the electricity bill which is more than covered by the gym membership fees. Undoubtedly, the biggest lost-making asset in Chin Woo is the swimming pool. In fact, according to many sources, everything is making losses and the gym is the most profitable of them all.

So, why the death certificate to the gym? Apparently, the gym has the least participants of all its ongoing activities thanks to the gym being at the back of the stadium and the lack of promotion from Chin Woo's administration. Who will thought of gym when Chin woo is mentioned to them? It was in the hope that sacrificing people like me allows for further developments for the piece of real estate, such as a few more parking space(:s). Since when commercialising is part of Chin Woo's dictum? It doesn't take a genius to figure out that the gym is sacrificed to that other activities can be sustained.

As you can see, Chin Woo has lost much of its spirits of sportsmanship. People take charge of Chin Woo just for the namesake and personal gains. People no longer want to put effort into something just for the love of it. Everything must be '$' that comes to mind. For everything else, there are plenty of scapegoats. Anybody here heard of Chin Woo doing promotion and membership recruitment drives in schools and colleges?

Mismanagement has caused Chin Woo a gym. I wonder what will be next. Anyway, the gym will formally cease operation on the 28th December 2007. If you guys want to have a real taste of what it is like, come quick. Opening hours from 5.00p.m. to 8.00p.m., weekdays only.

Toufoo Troopers?

About 2-3 days ago there were big headlines in all newspapers and tabloids, bringing the news of a few paratroopers drowning in Langkawi during a rehearsal for the LIMA show. Apparently there was a gush of wind coming out of the blue and blew them off course, resulting in 3 dead and a dozen injured. There was much grieve in the nation, including me and many accept it as the Act of God.

Out of curiosity, I wonder why there is suddenly so many people become Samyvellu??

IMHO, the government really owe us a good explanation. Either that or I missed out something. We already have graduates who can't speak, police who can't run and now, soldiers who can't swim?? What is the government doing with taxpayers money?

I remembered vividly that during standard 5, I watched a documentary on survival skills that says a parachutist needs to cut of his parachute-line right before his feet hit the water. A still attached chute will drag the person along the current into the deep sea.

If soldiers died as a result of smacking into skyscrapers Tarzan-style then I'll be able to comprehend. But well trained soldiers drown because they hit water!? C'mon!! I'm sure there must be better explanation than that.

Just imagine:

Scenario #1
You are on a plane crashing into the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Will you jump out of the plane in a chute or not?

Scenario #2
You are the army commander. Singapore is invading and deploying paratroopers are critical. You need to check the weather around the clock to minimise occurrences of 'Sudden Gust of Wind' and whether the rally point is anywhere near a swimming pool. A paratroop retaliation on Singapore is virtually non-existent because the damn bloody rock is so small the troops probably end up in the water anyway.

Scenario #3
You are a paratrooper.
1) You cannot land into the jungle because your chute will get caught with the branches and you will be dangling like a swing.
2) You cannot land near a pool because you drown.
3) You cannot simply jump off a plane because you need to test the weather before hand. Try shoving off your colleague to test the wind.
4) Preferable destination is an open air-field, no wind and a grand red carpet laid down for you to land on.

Therefore, I hope you guys out there can tell me more about parachuting and this 'sudden gust of wind' thingy because I'm wondering whether the troops are:

1) well trained
2) well equipped
3) too good, so much that there were no rescue boat and first aider around the scene of accident.

Do leave your comments.

A Different Perspective

Recently I was fortunate enough to have an invitation from a close friend of mine to a stand-up comedy in Bangsar Shopping Complex albeit on my own expense. The title of the show was 'Eh, Got Free Ticket ah?' featuring Douglas Lim, Harith Iskandar and the evergreen Jit Murad.

The reason why I went is because I was totally captivated by the front part of her email: 'Eh, Got FREE ticket ah...'with the question mark totally overlooked.

It was a show poking fun of Malaysia's distinctive culture and way of life, and sure enough it was full with political undertones. For those who has no clue of what is stand-up comedy, it is somebody giving a talk on just about anything and issues are brought up in a fun way. A good stand-up comedy does not only leave you in stitches but actually give you something to digest.

I must admit that I've learnt as much as I laughed but the most important lesson of it all was what it takes to be a good stand-up comedian.

Jit Murad

As what Douglas Lim said, it is very challenging for a Chinese to become a comedian. As it is, there are only 2 Chinese comedians in Malaysia, one being him and the other Lim Keng Yaik. I thought all along that an entertainer is a blessed lot, where they can use their inherent traits in looks and voice to charm the audience but the eye-opener that I had recently really opened up my rusty tin can called the Brain.

A good comedian needs more of a good brain that charms to come up with loads of ideas only to condense them to a very few killer-jokes. From these jokes, he has to weed out those that don't send out any positive messages to the public. And then, there is also the question of appropriateness as all the points need to be summed up and weaved intricately into a 30 minute show, one point linking another. After that, comes relentless practice for the very big day. If added on to the effort placed on body-grooming and polishing oratory skills, a stand-up comedy is not really that 'stand-up' after all. Of all the comedians that I met (though very few), all of them can knock the sparks out of a neurosurgeon.

This experience made me appreciate entertainment even more and I hope that my mom can read my blog and understand the values of true entertainers. After that, hopefully she will be very supportive of me going to cinemas and actors studios and provide me 100% subsidy along the way. Fingers crossed.

ps: To a very very sweet girl out there, don't forget you owe me 13 bucks ya!!

Malaysian Politicians Say the Darndest Things

I was at Popular Bookshop last Wednesday sniffing for new books as usual and I came across a book by Amir Muhammad, Malaysian Politicians Say the Darndest Things.

Its a thin book and I finished it in one sitting. It contains some of the more quirky quotes and remarks by Malaysian politicians from 1980s onwards and I have to say that I couldn't stop laughing my heads off. For RM 30, this is surely a must by for true Malaysians as it revealed a lot of the behaviour and mentality of Malaysian politicians (Which I must say is not one of the most honest).

It displays much of the oratory skills our politicians have and also some of their slip-ups and derogatory remarks.

Some of those didn't even contain any cow sense as in:

“The Indonesians and Filipinos don’t even have enough to fill their stomachs. Who are they to lecture us on press freedom? We are more qualified because we have full stomachs”
-Information Minister Mohamad Rahmat

"He is not clever at doing it... to be a fraudster you need skills. Fraudsters should always be a notch above their victims. He didn't learn from me or I could have given him some tips... As a father I am disappointed."
- Senator Muhammad Abdul Ghani, implicating his son in a scandal of cloned Approved Permits (APs) for imported cars. (The New Straits Times, 11 October 2006)

"FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!"
Bung Moktar Radin (Barisan National-Kinabatangan)

This is a really satisfying read. Other quotes includes Samy's comparison of toilets with wives and PAS's remark that the government should employ ugly Malay women only because the prettier can get rich husbands. (At least this way Malay boys will be more independent when looking for a job!)

At the end of the day, I found a new revelation where I become much closer to the country. Though it is not the best way, I do feel proud of being a Malaysian. At least we don't get into fist fights like in Taiwan or Japan. We resolve things in such a comical way!

Thought you've seen it all? Wait till you read a 1980s letter from Mahathir to a then European boy of 10, Abercombie. It'll make you laugh with your tears rolling down.

Banks the Den of Thieves??

A few days ago i went to the bank to run some errands. It was not the rudimentary type of deposit or withdrawal, and i needed assistance. When i was still standing in front of the numbering machine, still pondering which service i actually need, a staff came across me politely and inquired me if i needed assistance. I smiled and turned my head to her, but then my sweet smile turned to frost.

The first thing that went into my mind was 'Rompak'. Aghast, I took a step back, and had a quick, second look. There, hanging by a lanyard was a button with the words 'Bank Rompak Bonus Kami' inscribed on it.

I thought for a second somebody was approaching me with the intention to rob a bank. I heaved a sigh of relieve when I found that it was not but I couldn't stop revolting on seeing the deceiving smile on the assistant's face. As some of you might know, some banks had recently 'renegotiated' a plan that no longer guarantees 2 month bonus to bank employees. It enables the employers to have a more flexible hand in rewarding the more productive and effectively cut done fixed cost.

I couldn't feel much sorrier for the banks. With the current economy facing the onslaught of recession, they have to put up with the enemy underneath the cover (Musuh Dalam Selimut). Wearing those buttons are totally unprofessional and inconsiderate as their public display of defiance also carries a heavy dose of hypocrisy. One might ask:

If the banks are thieves, why not quit the job all together?
Why work for thieves?
If you work for thieves, doesn't it make you a thief as well?
Does defaming the company which logo you are wearing not defaming you as well?
Does scaring away the customers help the bank to feed your kids better?
If banks are thieves, then who the hell are you if you take your wage and at the same time destroying the image of the one that is paying you?

This is a disease of Malaysia. I'm 100% supportive of them protesting for their rights if and only if they take time off from their job and have a work strike. At least then they come clean and fight with real 'backbones'. I'm disgusted. Seeing bloodsucking Malaysians acting so dignified make me sick!!!

For pictures, see this poor Maybank. This tiger has fleas!

How many zeroes are there in a Trillion?

If

1 million = 1,000,000
1 billion = 1,000,000,000

A trillion wil be = 1,000,000,000,000, with 12 zeroes.

How about Rm4 trillion then? well, I guess, for zeroes, if any, there will only be one - Malaysia.

Last week, my first impression on this case was the lawyers trying to shame the government in a desperate attempt to raise the profile of the backwater Indians. Little did I know they were going for broke.

First of all, kudos to all of them for having such guts to do it. Gathering a 10,000 strong possession is not an easy feat, considering that public awareness and civic mindedness in Malaysia is wanting at best. Perhaps next time, they'll do a much better job agreeing on a time with Keadilan eh?

Photos of the protest on Sunday, 25th November 2007

Pics from Reuters

I pity the Indians. Being the poorest among the 3 majority races (races according to history books) , they are often sidelined and 'overlooked'. Brace yourself that Mr. Sammy might declare it as an 'Act of God'. But really, they couldn't expect him to do any better job, or any other Indian leaders for the matter. No point blaming him for lack of action on issues branded 'taboo' for the last 40 years.

Pic from ChinaDaily

Grabbing international limelight is surely a way to overcome it. I certainly will pimp myself just to know what's going on in the mind of The Honourable Dato' Seri Syed Hamid Albar right now, Malaysia's foreign minister who had just been on BBC HardTalk denying any racial differences and endorsed that each and everybody is contented with the New Economic Policy.

Nevertheless, one wonders how foolish can it be risking the lives of innocents defying the government when at best they could garner only 8% of the population. At best, I would think it is a stalemate.

Surely, a possible outcome is for the government to have an ISA crackdown, much like OPS Lallang, and the issue will be washed away by time.

The other scenario will be for the government to give promises for the Indian community, and

1) Never actually work on the promises
2) Actually work on the promises and:

a) Successfully turn around the fortunes of the Indians.
b) The promises are not kept 5-10 years down the road (Malaysia has 3rd world mentality in maintaining things)
c) The promises were revoked 5-10 years down the road because of rising oil prices

For scenario B, at least MIC will have the opportunity to keep the government in check.
Anyway, I am certain there are other 'happier' options to deliver the message across. I came up with 3.

1) Sue the British Government once in a while, including the families of British leaders in Malaya back then. Keep the limelight focus on the plight of the Indians.

2) Produce more babies and have a bigger say in everything when they reach 30% of the population.

3) Shut-up and learn from the Chinese.

Its all for you to figure it out. Do leave your comments.

HELP Lantern Festial

7th of October 2007 will always be a day to remember, for various reasons.

First of all, it will be an integral part of my record breaking event in which i will be spending 12 straight days in HELP, due complete this coming Friday, hanging out with the same dudes and doing stuffs a little bit more exciting than watching paint dry.

Secondly, dined in the dark, by the drain, with 3 hot chicks and the rain came pouring. (Hope i grabbed the correct fried chicken)

Thirdly, was able to cheat a bed sheet from the guys from Hitz.fm by asking them for the last trading price of HIC.

Fourth, got to run around with Dr. Paul Chan in the rain.

And finally, had a taste of becoming a big time mooncake seller.

All these made true only through HELP Lantern Festival 2007.

It is by far the only charity event that i have mixed feelings. As known, HELP is raising funds to help a particular student, Ms. Chia Leng Yau who suffered from Leukemia. Being at the fore front of charity, AIESEC HELP helped out in the event, by selling mooncakes for HELP Econ department. I reached there bout 5.30p.m., signed my name and worked with Yee Joo to get things going. Commander Tang has for us a truck load of mooncakes from which we should use common sense to squeeze charitable funds out of them. Pretty tall order considered that its dry goods and then mooncake festival has just passed but being who we are, we managed to get a satisfying sum out of the very very short time that we were allowed to paddle in the carpark.

With creativity, we managed to arrange a pretty decent stall out of nothing but 4 rectangular tables. Food were catered to all of us (and AIESECers were beginning to turn up in throngs). There were Digi and its Army and Hitz.FM (where i got THE XL sized shirt). Dr. Paul Chan, Mrs. Chan and Dr. Khong all turned up but what was more satisfying was the appearance of HELP ICT students, students of SEC which was acquired by HELP recently. We are like a one big family now. There was a makeshift stage where varied performances were catered to the euphoric us and we all danced and moved in response to the tunes. There were marshal arts performances, dances, bands, and if I'm not mistaken, an Indian singing Chinese song!

But perhaps, heaven got deeply moved by us that He decided to weep. Light beatings of rain drops and lightnings streaking across the sky signaled the premature end of the event.

Though I must say that it was a little bit of a let down towards the end, it is nevertheless a fun event, held for a good cause. And if I were to turn back time, knowing that it will still rain nonetheless, you will still see me running around like a madman in the rain in the open carpark, with an umbrella perhaps.